This is part of my year-long series exploring human-centered alternatives to the spiritual promises in Oswald Chambers’ classic devotional My Utmost for His Highest. Today’s entry, “The Discipline of Disillusionment,” promises that relationships based in God will not end in cynical disillusionment, claiming that divine disillusionment helps believers “see men and women as they are” without bitterness, and that only Jesus Christ can satisfy “the deepest aching abyss of the human heart,” preventing the despair that comes from trusting human beings.
Here’s what trusting that God-based relationships prevent cynical disillusionment and that Jesus satisfies the heart’s deepest needs actually delivered:
“Unless your relationships are based in God, they’ll end in cynical disillusionment,” Pastor Johnson warned with spiritual certainty. “But disillusionment that comes from God brings you to see people as they are without bitterness. Place your trust in Jesus Christ, not human beings, and you’ll never despair of anyone. Only our Lord can satisfy the deepest aching abyss of your heart.”
Rebecca had been devastated when her closest friend betrayed her confidence and her husband left for another woman in the same month. The promise that basing relationships in God rather than human trust would prevent cynical disillusionment and that Jesus would satisfy her heart’s deepest needs seemed like the spiritual protection she desperately needed.
Rebecca desperately wanted to believe that divine relationship foundation would prevent future relational pain and cynicism. Instead of focusing on evidence-based approaches to healthy relationships, boundary-setting, and understanding human psychology, she tried to base all her connections in God and trust Jesus alone to satisfy her relational needs, believing this would protect her from the bitterness that comes from expecting too much from people.
For months, Rebecca avoided forming deep human connections, believing that trusting people rather than God inevitably led to despair and cynicism. When friends offered genuine emotional support and suggested therapy to process her betrayal trauma, she declined, convinced that finding satisfaction in Jesus rather than human relationships would prevent the cruel disillusionment that comes from unrealistic expectations of others.
But the promised protection from cynical disillusionment through God-based relationships was deeper isolation disguised as spiritual wisdom.
Rebecca’s attempts to base relationships in God and find satisfaction in Jesus alone created additional loneliness on top of betrayal trauma. The freedom from cynicism that divine relationship foundation was supposed to provide remained absent while her capacity for human connection atrophied and her understanding of healthy relationship dynamics remained undeveloped. The heart satisfaction that Jesus was supposed to provide never materialized when she needed genuine human support most.
Meanwhile, Rebecca’s neighbor Michelle approached her own betrayal experiences with zero expectation that spiritual relationship foundation would prevent disillusionment or that divine satisfaction would replace human connection needs. When Michelle faced similar friendship betrayals and relationship breakdowns, she immediately sought therapy to understand relationship patterns, joined support groups for betrayal trauma, and focused entirely on evidence-based approaches to building healthier connections through better boundary-setting and communication skills.
Michelle didn’t search for God-based relationship foundation but treated relational challenges as psychological and social issues requiring professional guidance and skill development. Her healing came through trauma therapy, attachment work, and gradually rebuilding her capacity for human connection through sustained practical education about healthy relationship dynamics rather than trusting that Jesus would satisfy her deepest relational needs while protecting her from cynical disillusionment.
When Rebecca finally sought similar professional help, she discovered that healthy relationship recovery required understanding human psychology and developing practical relationship skills rather than trusting that God-based connections would prevent disillusionment and that Jesus would satisfy her heart’s deepest needs.
Where was the protection from cynical disillusionment that basing relationships in God was supposed to guarantee? Where was Jesus satisfying the deepest aching abyss of her heart so she wouldn’t despair of human connection?
The healing that actually helped came through accepting the complexity of human relationships and focusing on evidence-based relationship skills, not through believing that divine relationship foundation would prevent cynicism and that spiritual satisfaction would replace human connection needs. The silence where God-based relationship protection was supposed to manifest revealed the truth: there was no divine foundation that prevented relational disillusionment or spiritual satisfaction that replaced human connection needs.
Only psychological patterns and relationship skills that required professional understanding and practical development to navigate human connection healthily without cynicism.
Reflection Question: When has understanding relationship psychology and developing practical connection skills been more effective than basing relationships in God to prevent cynical disillusionment?
This story is part of my upcoming book “The Undevoted: Daily Departures from Divine Dependence,” which offers 365 human-centered alternatives to the spiritual certainties in Chambers’ devotional. Each day explores how reason, community, and human resilience can address life’s challenges without requiring divine intervention.
God or Delusion? 